Look at me! I’m a cat! I am wise, wily, and wicked. I’m an avid fantasy reader who has agreed to post on Mr. Ryan’s blog. I’ve read Mr. Ryan’s books. They’re all great, except for one flaw: No cats! What is the problem? He had rats! But no cats. I’ll be contacting PETA soon unless you include a cat in the next book. Be warned, Mr. Ryan. Overlooking a class of animal as prevalent as we are is tantamount to deliberate oppression. You have not heard the last of me. And if PETA doesn’t respond, it’ll be the Labor Department. I’ll take you to court and sue you for as many cat treats as your 401k can provide.
Unless, um … um … you rub my ears and fluff my pillow and let me rub my body against your calves. Don’t step on me! Just let me revel in my silken loveliness!